Friday, October 28, 2011

How to drink...

So one of the things about leaving an uptight, fundamentalist type religion is that options open up.

Now I'm not into hard drug, orgies and stuff like that, but after a certain religious leader in my area, started being particularly douchey, I figured it was time to rebel a little.

Up until I was 34, the closest I had come to liquor was a drop of Archers Peach Schapps off my girlfriends finger back in high school.

Anyway, so my journey from good Mormon boy to the fun loving guy I am today, is a topic for another day, but for those who embark on a similar journey, I'd like to offer a wee bit of advice.

Monday, October 24, 2011

Up Twenty Pounds

It's official... I'm up 20 pounds since IronMan last year. That's like a pound a month.

Anyway, so in addition to getting back into the pool this week, I'm going to try out this new device...

And just in case anyone is still reading, this probably isn't safe for work, or kids - unless you have my boss, in which case, he'll probably laugh his head off, but all your co-workers will be offended.

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

A New Title

So Orrin Hatch, the disrespectable sentator from Utah, invited his good buddy, Dallin Oaks to testify before Congress today. Which before I even begin, is a great way of proving that Mormon politicians aren't beholden to their religious puppet masters.

But moving on... Dallin sits before Congress and expounds the virtues of charitable giving in America, touting how it helps the poor, and the homeless.

This thing is...

Mr Oaks is exceptionally wealthy, likely pulling in more than half a million a year, in addition to book deals, paid food, clothing and housing, and all kinds of other religious benefits.

And let's not also forget the $3 billion plus mall, the wonderfully humanitarian minded Church he belongs to is building in down-town Salt Lake City.

Religion in America is generally not about charity, and helping the downtrodden and homeless. It's about enriching douche bags like Mr. Oaks who use fear of the unknown to trick good, and genuine people into paying into the corporate coffers.

I've called Mr. Oaks on his bullshit before, and today, I think we should add hypocrite to his list of illustrious titles as well.

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Spot the Difference

Folks, one of the "Signs of the Times" put forth by the Mormon faithful is the idea that an awful scourge will cover the face of the earth. This may actually be something common to other sects as well, but Mormons are the only ones I can speak authoritatively to.

Various ideas have been proffered as to what this scourge might be. When I was a kid, it was AIDS, and more recently I've heard it to be Homosexuality.

While I reject the whole signs of the times thing as a bunch of crap, designed only to instill fear in the faithful, and get them to cough up more money for church coffers, I do believe we face a scourge.

Extremist Religion, and I'm not just talking about Islamic Extremists either.

Considering comments which Glenn Beck made (or did not make, or did not, not make). I think it appropriate to make a little comparison.

Consider Glenn Beck the Osama Bin Ladin of the Christian Extremist movement.

Is there a difference, aside from language?

Consider the faithful Glenn Beck devotee, the little Jihadist of the movement.

9/11 happens, and Bin Ladin takes responsibility and talks about how it is a warning to infidels from Allah.

The horrendous Japanese earthquake happens, and Glenn claims responsibility for his God (or rather, doesn't not, not claim responsibility for his God), and talks about how it is a warning from God.

And all the little Beck Jihadists take to the internet, and in a manner similar to the Jihadist chanting death to the infidel, and burning the American Flag, they defend the ass hat that is Glenn Beck, and criticize any who might question his holiness.

Am I completely off base here?

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Scarlet Fever?

Have you ever know anyone with Scarlet Fever?

Well, raise your hand. I ended up getting it as a complication with a bout of strep I had last week.

It's an interesting thing. There was a point when I was seriously contemplating the fact that I could die - and in all actuality, I may have, had I not finally gone to see the doctor.

And after losing my faith in religion, God and in life after death, you might think that the prospect would be terrifying.

Surprisingly enough, I felt just fine about it. I was worried that I'd be leaving Mrs Koda in a pretty nasty situation, but as for me and death. I really didn't bother me that much.

Oh... And I'm just peachy now, thanks to a nice big shot of penicillin in my ass!

Sunday, February 20, 2011

I am actually still alive

Back when I was a Mormon missionary, I could tell how thing were going based on what happened with my letter writing on the portion of the day we were given off each week.

If things were going really well, then I'd usually have to write really big and double space the letter to my parents, just to fill up the aerogram. And the letter to my girlfriend would usually only be a page or two.

But when things were shitty. When they had me paired up with a psychotic nazi of a companion, when the weather was awful, and when the mission president had just come down on me again, because my parents had pull a dick move on my behalf...

I wrote a couple of aerograms to my parents, and the girlfriend would usually get a 12 to 20 page epic, double sided and full of all kinds of stuff.

Why do I bring this all up?

I switch jobs 3 weeks ago. It's been an extreme awakening when it comes to the field in which I am employed, and trying to learn everything has been a little like drinking from a firehose. BUT I LOOOOOOVE IT! It's nice to be busy, it's nice to be learning new things, and the obscene pay raise I got has allowed us to start paying down the debt accumlated through years of paying our tithing and working for the corporation which supports gods only true Church on earth. I'll spare you the pages of me bitching about how god really should have been helping us out, instead of continually shoving the large, splitery bamboo pole up our collective asses.


So with all of that good and great stuff happening, I'm afraid I've been slacking on the blog.

Hopefully I'll find a way to return to regular blogging soon. But until I do... Know that I am doing fabulously, and at least in my case, no news is good news.

Perhaps I should switch to producing a daily podcast, compiled during the 2 hours I commute to and from the new job...